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FANTASY LIFE.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Somehow I feel, debts are meant to return... kindness are meant to repay... but I think I have been eating on my own medicine... It is going to cost me my life...
There is only 2 things i regret in life:
1) being unfilial to my parents
2) being unfaithful to my ex, eileen
so far i know, human do change... these few months I have been looking on a lot of this on reality of life...
Wait with patience, change with eager to hope for that tiny hope has invade my brain slowly... I cannot think straight... all I know is to hold on to it, if you really hope for it...
who am I?
a person who can be a great help, and a nuisance when you do not need?
anyway that people out there can enjoy their happiness... no matter what happened, angel will be with you if you never committed sins... vice versa, devil will stalk you for life if you never do good deeds...
I know I have been wrong for past few years... time to repay has passed... I have repay all my sins...
No more tears, no more feelings, no more looking back on it... no more perseverance and fantasy has faded...
Sayonara
---------------Leaving on Fantasy--------------- ; {10:57 PM}
_________________________________________________________
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
meet up with my bro Shah last night...
it has been more than 14 days since we last met...
paiseh being busy throughout this period of time...
trying to forget...
but the memories have been rooted firm in my heart...
the more i try to forget...
the more i am being reminded...
rained heavily last night...
ever since i small...
i used to have this habit...
sit in front of balcony door and look into the emptiness of heavy rain...
let my mind relax...
let my feelings flow...
it is the only time i feel comfortable...
went pub with jiuan hua...
QB bar lol...
since long time ago...
had become a routine patroniser...
i always went there with her...
but she is no more there...
no more... forever... ever...
tried to cut in queue on the pool table...
thought i was going to lose on the first round of challenge...
never thought that...
i won miracly...
and i won and won again...
for 4 games...
"qing chang shi yi, qiu chang de yi"?
means i been a loser on love, but a winner on pool?
is it too late to turn back now?
if only i can perform that well on love...
as what i did on pool table...
i really do my best not to think of it...
because it seems to drift away from me far...
i cannot touch it...
but my feelings towards it still strong enough to make me cry again...
sigh...
i do not want to shed any more tears...
but it is uncontrollable...
ironic is not it?
i really hardly cry...
but i really feel lost...
for this time...
---------------Leaving on Fantasy--------------- ; {10:38 AM}
_________________________________________________________
